Scientists Provide New Laugh!
And thank goodness for science and the men who put their faith in it as if it were a religion! What would we do without these guys?
The latest comedy came this week in the journal aptly named, Science. We were holding our breath, but thankfully the news came in earlier than expected, as Space.com reported. The news is — drum roll, please — the Age of the Universe!
Previous attempts to date the Universe (a Universe in which scientists don’t even know if they are observing it in its entirety) stated that it was 10 billion to 15 billion years old. Then, it was revised to 13 billion to 14 billion years old.
But, thank God, all that is now behind us!
Scientists with Case Western University and Dartmouth College have brought us new calculations based on “new information” — now stay with us here and don’t nod off — “about old star clusters in our galaxy.”
Now before we give these new calculations, it is imperative that we understand the these scientists state that their “new appraisal comes with a 95-percent level of confidence.”
Wow! 95 percent! That’s almost perfect!
And what does that 95-percent “confidence” figure yield? Why the “team of researchers,” as Space.com reports, “says the Universe is between 11.2 billion and 20 billion years old”!
Well, that certainly clears matters up!
This is amazing! How did they do it? Why there is only a difference of about 8.8 billion years, give or take a few atomic seconds.
These guys are incredible! Can you believe how “smart” they are? They are truly the “wise men” of our time. Who can doubt their figures?
After all, their appraisal is “based on when stars are thought to end the main sequence of their lives, a point at which they’ve used up the hydrogen that fuels thermonuclear fusion … .”
Of course! Everyone knows what that rate is! It is an observable factor since the beginning of mankind and has been recorded diligently throughout the centuries. How could they be wrong? As we all know, we have personal eyewitness accounts and calculations of just how long a billion years really is and what happens to the stars in the Universe during that time.
So, therefore, it is easy for us as a species to just then “extrapolate” the data and calculate for say another 10, 20, 30 or ever perhaps a 100 billion years. That’s no big deal, right?
What’s a few billion years anyway? Nothing really changes in that time frame — at least not significant enough to be factored in — and there are no unknown factors that could possibly make finely tuned “new” appraisals, such as this one, regarding the Age of the Universe incorrect, right?
One of these incredible “know-it-alls” was quoted by Space.com as saying that with this “new” appraisal, “we are establishing the essential features of the cosmos that will serve as the datum at the basis for fundamental physics in the 21st Century and beyond.”
Excuse us, what did you say?
Apparently, all that gobbledygook serves a golden purpose. It covers these guys butts — you know, the old CYA — of where their grant $$$ monies $$$ are spent. It’s how they keep the millions rolling in. They are answering the question to their benefactors, “What are you doing with all that money?”
And here’s the real answer: NOTHING! It’s big waste of time; a farce, and the joke is, as one might take an educated guess, on those who believe there’s any validity to this junk.
These are the same type of idiots who carbon date the Shroud of Turin and say, “Oh, it’s a medieval forgery. It only dates through our ‘scientific methods’ to the Middle Ages. Obviously, it’s not real.”
Morons! They wouldn’t know something was real if it stood up and smacked them in their face (as they say)! We are disgusted with the stupidity of scientific “research” like this and their continued attempts to prove anything but the reality of Creation and its Creator: In the beginning God created Heaven and Earth (Genesis 1:1).
They feed our children this junk dazzling them with numbers while ignoring the Genius behind them. Our schools eat this junk up and throw God out!
These scientists, and others like them, continue to make fools of themselves; and not just before us, but, more importantly, before the Heavenly Court and the Just Judge. How will Jesus judge these people? What does He do with people who look for answers beyond our simple human comprehension while ignoring the Truth of the Lord’s Sacrifice and Love for us?
The Apostle Paul tells us about these people, for the Lord was not, is not and will never be unaware of them. So we can read about them in Romans 1:18-22:
For the wrath of God is revealed from Heaven
against all ungodliness and injustice of those men
that detain the Truth of God in injustice;
because that which is known of God is manifest in them.
For God hath manifested it unto them.
For the invisible things of Him,
from the creation of the world,
are clearly seen, being understood
by the things that are made;
His external power also, and Divinity:
so that they are inexcusable.
Because that, when they knew God,
they have not glorified Him as God,
or given thanks;
but became vain in their thoughts,
and their foolish heart was darkened.
For professing themselves to be wise,
they became fools.
Well, we hope these scientists enjoy their continued funding and grants, because the same “95-percent level of confidence” in their appraisal is the same figure that the so-called “scientists” stated when they dated the Shroud of Turin to the 1300s! In reality, the irrefutable facts prove — now don’t expect a cosmologist to agree with this — that carbon dating is wrong! It is the most inexact “science” known to man. (Whew! Talk about bustin’ their bubble!)
In reality, the cloth from other known factors dates from the 1st Century and originated in Israel!
But scientists like this who love carbon dating will never believe it. Carbon dating is one of their idols. They are like the people who run and operate the Skeptical Inquirer magazine. They still pay homage to their god, Carl Sagan and his “billions and billions” of stupid ideas. How much have we as a nation spent on Sagan’s SETI (Search for Extraterrestrial Intelligence) project? How many ET’s have they found? It only needs a few “billion” years and a few more “billion” dollars to maintain this unyielding research.
While the Shroud will always be deemed a fake to so-called “skeptics” like the now-defunct Sagan and his little windup Inquirer drolls, these same people will immediately embrace as “good science” the work, as Amos and Andy might say, of “dese here boys who sure do’s knows dis here’s-a Universe!”
Hmm. Are we too harsh in our words here? Then please think of all the souls Sagan, as a founder of this magazine, and his cohorts have hurt by screaming at every opportunity in every possible media their wrong belief that the Shroud is not real. For many of these atheistic scientists, who seem like Sagan to gravitate to cosmology, the Shroud has become a fanatical hate campaign. While science cannot properly date a cloth on Earth, these same type of scientists dare to claim they can ascertain the Age of the Universe.
The reality?
“Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools.”
We wonder if there is a message here for all of us as human beings, especially our educators who teach our children. Remember, those with doctorates who like to be called “doctors” are in reality “rabbis.” Rabbi is the Hebrew word for “teacher” and the Latin translation for this word is “doctor.”
But they have forgotten who the Master Teacher is.
The Truth is, we in our scientific calculations, as fallible human beings, are anything but “wise.” These scientists, in their rush to date an unknowable — the true Age of the Universe, which only the Ancient of Days is able to calculate — are following the stars. But like astrologers, they are following the wrong stars. They have made a drastic mistake.
They are not like the Wise Men of the Gospel: men who watched the stars and found God by following the Star of Bethlehem!
At this time during the celebration of the Feast of the Epiphany — which commemorates Jesus’ manifestation to the Gentiles when the Wise Men found Him through the Star of Bethlehem, as well as His shining bright as the sun on Mount Tabor before James, John and Peter — let us not forget that there are only two ways:
the way to God and the way away from God.
Let us not be like these “scientists” of today, chasing after the wrong age-old stars, while ignoring “that which is ... of God” and which “God hath manifested ... unto them.” Let us follow and chase after the Ever-Lasting Light.
In reality, these cosmologists must be among the laughingstock of Heaven as they feebly try to explain “the things that are made” and then neglect the most important fact left out of their equations: “His external power.”
Surely it is not an accident that the description of their “expertise” bears such a striking resemblance to the word “cosmetology.” It is only the letters “E” and “T” that make the difference: like in “extraterrestrials”!
And we all know, how colorful many of our local cosmetologists are and that they’re just a little bit off in their head — remarkably like our cosmologists.
The difference between a cosmologist and a cosmetologist is — and we have a confidence level of 95 percent in this — only 8.8 billion brain cells, give or take a million.
© 2003 Agnus Dei Presents!